Actually not the pregnancy one, but the pretty much all the rest. I probably should have made a checklist when I started work on the farm cabin, it would have been fun to put a little tick in each box. The Impossible Timeline: This one has moved so many times I don’t even know why…

The last few weeks has been a lot, and this time not all of it is in my head. I mean a bit of it is, obviously because I am what I am, but external logs have been tossed on the fire. When my stepmother was dying I was living in a different state and…

It’s been over three years now of constant distraction. A never ending treadmill of jobs, stress, food, pills, shopping, surface level chats, and social media posts. A functional wreck with a smile holding back a dam full of tears and acceptance. Not only have I not dealt with grief, guilt, anger… I have let it…

I woke up with my shoulders on fire from a few days of working above my head on rafters and ceilings. The desire to take some painkillers and lay on the couch all day was very strong. Luckily it’s only a couple of days after a new year so there is a still a sliver…

I’m really sick of struggling being my whole personality at the moment. Objectively I get it because it has been a hell of a few years and that stuff would grind anyone into a thick unpleasant paste, but still… Complicated children, some health issues, and a sprinkling of poor decision seasoning all added to a…

As any technically minded individual will be able to tell you all electronic devices have an inner core of magic smoke that makes them function. Which is why when you see a puff of smoke escaping from your laptop it doesn’t work anymore, because of the lack of aforementioned magic smoke. Although I am not…

Today at the farm I saw a tawny frogmouth owl. I have never seen one there (or anywhere) before, let alone a stones throw from where I was. I will acknowledge that they have a very effective camouflage routine of pretending to be a branch so it’s possible it has been there and I haven’t…

Today was a day off from working on the the cabin, so I set the fire to the beacons. Yes I did say Gondor calls for aid! as the flames took hold. There is something about tending a fire that pushes everything else out of my mind for a while. It’s a task that requires…

When I went through a serious bout of PSTD induced insomnia a few years ago I was pretty much ready to check out a few times. But with a lot of work and a very strict sleep routine I managed to reset myself and get back to a more or less normal sleep schedule. Which…