Do you ever just shut down for a bit? Sometimes when I’m just not up to dealing with things I just pull up the blinds to shield those around me from what’s going on inside.

Today was a shut down day. I took a book and my iPad and went to bed. I didn’t end up reading or watching anything, I just pulled a blanket over my head and used zero energy on anything, even my brain mercifully slowed right down for a few hours, which is unusual enough to celebrate. I’m now back to a point where I can put my functional human mask back on if needed, which is a level I have to maintain as the “grownup” in the house. I always seem to have just enough left in the tank to do the bare minimum of parenting even when everything is else is falling apart.

Luckily the kids are being fairly low maintenance at the moment, and the ex is having them at her house this weekend. So if I can’t shake this malaise it might just be a weekend of sitting around in standby mode, burning the least amount of energy possible, waiting for someone to plug me in, or switch me off.