Wouldn’t that be a depressing way to spend your birthday? What I did instead was have a bit of lie in until the cat decided his breakfast was late. Then I had breakfast at the village markets with my ex-wife who gave me a lift out to collect my car from the farm and she kindly paid for my bacon and egg roll and a coffee. She also gave me an annoyingly thoughtful card with a water colour of the farm creek and a Tolkien quote inside. She also signed it “Your Ex-Wife” because she is only slightly less hilarious than I am.

At least two of my regrets involve her, maybe three…